Hello everybody. Welcome back to the show. My guest today is me, I hit 2.75 million subscribers on YouTube and to celebrate ask for questions from YouTube, community, and Twitter and Instagram. So here is another two hours of me trying to get through as many as possible expect to learn. Whether I'll bring Bernie Sanders on the podcast. What I think about women's value to the world. Why my forearms are this size? How to deal with loneliness whether I'll release merch?
Why I'm still a big emo kid. My advice for people going through a tough time and much more. This episode is brought to you by Shopify Shopify Powers 10% of all e-commerce companies in the United States, they're the driving force behind new tonic and a few other brands you've probably heard of like Jim shark and all birds. You can think of Shopify as your business sidekick from setting up shop to scaling your business. They've got you covered. You're not going into business to learn about how to code or build a website.
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Modern wisdom. But now, ladies and Gentlemen, please
welcome
Me, what's happening? People,
welcome back to the show. It is a 2.75 million, subscriber, Q&A episode, and I'm in a brand new studio for the people that listening, you know, can be
See it. But this is my new studio, finally finished in all its glory and I think it looks absolutely beautiful. I can show you here. Look at this, it's London. Telephone box, London Bridge here and see and hear and speak. No evil statues. And I've got a thinking man thinking and Guy, Atlas holding up the world and little dinosaur skull noach. Secret little Easter egg of a hand climbing up,
Up and I love it. I love the colors. I think it looks, it's perfect, it's our brand, it's the teal, it's the orange, the lighting is amazing. So yeah, my Director of Photography made me a present for 2.75 million subscribers. Anyway, I asked the questions on Twitter and Instagram and YouTube and there were lots. So let's get into it. Jim Cooper, I love your podcast Chris, I'm sure you're not misogynistic, but the statement woman's value to the world in many ways. Lies in their beauty and youth comes across quite sexy.
And reductive to me. Yes, swing and a miss by me. They're using some imprecise language around a sensitive topic. I think the response here was a bit surprising because I must have brought up this exact cliche in 30 or 50 videos in the past that men have historically been valued for their ability to provide status and resources while historically women have had a premium placed on their age and that looks never said that its optimal or desire.
Rebel. But I would say that it's pretty reasonable as a historical assessment of how Society has judged men and women. I mean even now in the modern world there's entire Industries dedicated to serving these cliches cosmetic surgery, and makeup, and hair extensions and apps that are Brusha wrinkles away are all playing into this need for beautification and youth. The same as luxury car rental garages and online trading courses and pickup artist body language mastery.
Signs for men to enhance status and resources. The point that I was trying to make was about male body image issues that Society has typically emphasized the importance of beauty and youth in women for men stereotypically, it's been less important and yet men are on track to overtake women in rates of body dysmorphia within a few decades. I think it's an interesting pivot that man historically haven't been valued as much for their looks and that now seems to be changing and
Just because I talk about something doesn't mean that I supported analysis, is not justification. What I wanted to do was identify those previous stereotypes and then highlight this new world in contrast and it seems like that came across as me reinforcing The Stereotype as legitimate. And I get the sense that this is one of the problems with the audience growing so quickly because I think that I can just use imprecise, throw away short and references to tons of previous conversation.
Like I used to when the show was smaller and everyone would understand my broader point, but the show is probably half a million people bigger than the last time that this point got brought up. So a ton of viewers have no context, but then if I go through an in-depth reintroduction of each reference every time that I bring it up, that's going to get clunky and repetitive and arduous and patronize everyone like you never learn anything. So yeah, I'm going to have to work on that.
That hopefully that clears everything up and glad to hear that. I'm not a misogynist shotgun orphan. Congrats on all your. Well deserved success, I discovered your pod in 2021 and you've quickly become my favorite person to listen to thank you. When are we getting t-shirts and other merchandise Lee's take my money. Yeah I've been wearing this three-eyed skull. T-shirt thing on some training blogs and we've got one with modern wisdom across the front. I think we made maybe 20
Of those and it was just for me and Dean and a couple of the guys behind the scenes I would consider doing it but I know I'm not, I'm not a particularly good sort of seller of my own stuff. I need to work on that but soon I guess if I can find a way to do it without detracting from the million of the things that I've got to do. But it's nice to know that you like the
The you like the designs that pretty cool, I really like them. Lucas, I'm currently watching your Olympia prep Vlog, with Chris. What's it going on with the autoimmune stuff? I hope everything is going. Well yeah I kept this quiet. I have kept this quiet all year. I've been fighting with some health stuff. I think I've hinted at it a little bit and to be honest it's kind of it coming out of me.
Without meaning to I talk to friends and it's the thing that's on my mind it's been rough. It's been like by far the hardest year that I've had and then I've been trying to keep the show on top of it and I'm seeing a lot of
Threat and anxiety and my resilience is lower pretty much everywhere. So I think I'm going to do a sort of fully dedicated episode of maybe even a series of episodes to talking about the stuff that I've been going through gut dysbiosis like parrot, anti-parasitic treatments, mold environmental molds, EBV, like a pretty big list of things that apparently are not super uncommon for immigrants that
was moved to America because the environment and the food and a lot of the other stuff is unfamiliar and then maybe get some Specialists on because it's a really big deal and the brain fog in the mood and the energy has been
it's been tough. So I want to try and use it as a learning experience in one form or another everything is moving forward as best I can. I'm trying to not dwell on it and compensate where I can also. This is the most my dog ate my homework, excuse ever, but I've made more speech errors in the last six months or nine months this year.
Then I ever have I would have never made that imprecision error, with regards to women. Historically having taken most of their value dot dot dot. I would have never done that in the past. I would have never, I accidentally called Ed Witten, Ed button on the episode with Eric Weinstein. Oh, this might sound like a little thing, but for me, somebody who is usually pretty sort of 100% perfect on speech. Ed Dutton is this guy.
It's like a spicy race and IQ researcher, Ed Witten is a theoretical physicist. Like I just wouldn't have made that error and it keeps on happening. I'm forgetting people's names. I was looking at a dog that I know unbelievably well and just looked at it and didn't know its name. It's I'll talk about it freely toward the end of the year and also, you know, again we're being transparent. Why not?
It's been odd, not talking about it and then feeling like, I've got this huge thing that's going on behind the scenes. And then, how do I is it even that big of a deal you guys are here to just learn stuff and, and be entertained and educated? Why should I burden you with something that's burning me? But then also, you kind of the truth will set you free. Anyway, it's been, I've been thinking about it a lot and once I compiled my thoughts in a brain that's follow mold, I'll I'll talk to you more about it and maybe it'll be helpful and useful to anybody that's going through.
Stuff.
Conair, why are your forearms so massive?
Yeah, I this has been coming up more. I think it's because I've been doing more training blogs. I guess I do have like pretty big forearms but um, I honestly, it's just straight up genetics. It's like I've never done director at the first piece of direct for I'm training I've ever done. Was with my kids ratelle on a podcast. I the training blog three weeks ago. Its first time I've ever trained them so it's like that guy that's got
Massive cards. He go dude. What you do for training a class? He's like have good parents. I don't know how parents with big carps so they just start. Maybe it's a tumor of some kind and maybe this is what's causing all of the fucking brain fog. Maybe it's just filled with mold and autoimmune problems and I show. Z, Griffith 23. What's your relationship with caffeine / nicotine and do build in intentional breaks? Good question. So, for those of you who don't know, I did 500 days without caffeine
A couple of years ago which was significantly harder than 1000 days without alcohol, which I did the year before aren't finishing the year before and still, now my favorite way to consume caffeine, this includes me, tonic is to try and do it every other day. Sometimes when you can't, because you've got a bunch of days back-to-back where you really need it or you have multiple nights of bad sleep. But honestly, my best use case is just one day on one day off if you have it today, you can't have it tomorrow.
Oh, and if you have it, if you had it yesterday, you can't have it today. That's it. As a rule and it means that it keeps your tolerance nice and flat.
I was taught not that long ago that I think it takes nine days of cold turkey from caffeine to fully reset your Baseline. That adenosine system sensitivity that was from meno, hence, almonds. So blame him if it's not true, but you would be surprised at how quickly that sensitivity comes back. Nicotine, I'm not using, I haven't used that all that much knickknacks a nice but I'm stimulated enough frankly from like new tonic and just
As it is. So I don't really need anymore Vikram. Whoop addressed Our advice for subhumans below six foot in the current dating Market. I guess that makes me subhuman. I'm five ten and a half five eleven. I don't know man. Like I see guys who are not that tall, crushing it with girls all the time and I do think that the internet makes way more of a meme out of height for guys than it is now there's a girl the trains
In the gym with me, who is 62. She's got, like, an actual tall girl problem that she doesn't want to date a guy that shorter than her. And if you're 62, was a woman and you want to wear heels at your wedding, you're looking at professional athletes. Like, that's a, you know, that's a high bar. Literally, I don't think you need specific advice for subhumans below six foot in the current dating Market. It's the same as it's always been, like, be nice. Be as attractive and well presented as possible.
Emotionally aware present some status.
Like I don't be a dickhead that seems to work Alberto Nicolet. Your podcast stands out as the best looking one on YouTube and the production quality is truly impressive. Thank you. I'm curious. Why do you invest so much into the visual aspect? Especially since many listeners may not pay attention to it? Is it a personal goal for you or do you find it rewarding in other ways either financially or personally good question. So,
I don't know. I I like beautiful things just because I like looking at nice things, I think there's utility in Beauty and there's so many complaints about the modern world being sterile and transactional and people are just mailing it in, whether it's in music or in architecture, or an art, or in movies and doing the bare minimum to get by, or kind of feeding this chicken,
Soup, Instagram, story bullshit to you and I don't know, I want a body of work that I look back on and think that was beautiful. That was amazing. That was impressive. We really push the limits. I know it's funny. The show sometimes gets criticized for how like why you going to all of this effort? It's all style and no substance. My bro, there is the first years episodes had no video at all. And then after that, it was 300 episodes.
Me on Skype literally at 720p. I'm doing it. People have complaints for lazy content creators and then if you try and do something beautiful they've got complaints to. So I think the lesson there is that you can't really appease or satisfy anybody or everybody financially. It is a stupid idea. It is a house deposit every single time that we decide to do. One of these big sets of shoots, it is an obscene cost the single largest
Cost this entire larger than all of the staff that work for me larger than any of the production fees larger than anything is the cinema shoots. That's it rental houses insurance location. So, I don't know, I hope for the people that like beautiful things. This is a place that you can come and I like beautiful things. So hopefully for those that enjoy it, it's there for you as well. And for the people who aren't that first,
Just listen to it on Spotify or up or podcasts. Ryan J, IG. Chris, what's your daily nutrition plan? All right, I don't want to be that guy, but as part of this autoimmune recovery stuff, I'm fully carnival at the moment. Technically, I'm meat, and fruit. So carnivore was like the hipsters Quito and then meat and fruit was like, the hipsters hipsters carnivore.
so,
I am now that guy, I'm now a combination of Jordan Peterson and Paul saladino and deliver King. And I don't want to become an evangelist, which is why I have not brought it up because it's like cliche to be the guy that starts doing meat and fruit and won't shut up about it. But that's my current nutrition plan and I will come back to you in a couple of months and tell you what I think of it, City Bumpkin, will you ever get circumcised?
Eyes.
We questioned, um, I feel like adult circumcision is a really extreme.
A very extreme procedure to go through without a reason. I don't know whether that's now a sort of a trend thing like, when people used to, guys used to get the top of their ears pierced or nose, rings or whatever, I do know, a guy who got into a relationship with a Jewish woman and then before marrying her after he'd asked the father, whether he could he had to I think convert or
Transition whatever it's called to become Jewish and part of that was adult circumcision which is wild. So I fear that I'm going to remain team for skin Nick. Kurt a pal, do you ever feel lonely?
yeah, I did a lot in my 20s, you know, there was a note that I put in my phone, my diary once the I was just had a load low mood and I didn't really understand why and I was trying to work out what was going on and I just put, I think I'm lonely and wrote that in my phone and
It's got better since I've moved to America which is I guess strange to you, become less lonely when you move away from home but I still do, it's weird. This sort of transition thing with the Micro Niche. Degenerate Fame thing with the show and attention and not really knowing how to deal with that and then feeling ashamed about like, why would I why should I even complain about this? Like what a boys, you are luxury.
To be whining about. And then thinking, well that's not a very sort of delicate way to deal with yourself. You're not tricking yourself like a friend that you're responsible for helping there. So it's like infinite regress of feeling guilty or ashamed or sad that you're guilty or annoyed that you're ashamed. But yeah, you forget when you move to a country that speaks the same language as you, but you're not from that, you're still an immigrant and you know, you wouldn't notice it the same if you were entitled.
Thailand, or Russia, or France or Argentina, but if you move to a country where you speak the same language that they do natively, but you're not from there, it kind of creeps up on you. The fact that you're culturally displaced and yeah, I do. It's been an interesting year of of learning stuff and I'm working hard at trying to beat that.
Chronic since you didn't episode with be Shapiro, why not showcase the opposite perspective and how do you feel about the 2024 election? Yeah, I don't know who the opposite perspective to Ben would be
I'm bringing on Crystal Ball from Crystal and Saga, she's the left-leaning host. From that show Ana kasparian from The Young Turks. I think will be on next week trying to get Bernie Sanders on been trying to get that guy on for ages but difficult to get a hold of perhaps unsurprisingly. I kind of get the sense that the rebalancing of right versus left is a little bit hard to do because the there isn't really a left-leaning equivalent of been. I mean Brian
This has been on the show ardently anti-trump and definitely from the left, even Nate. Silver is from the left. Ryan holidays, been on this year. Scott Galloway, as being on Destiny's being on Democratic candidate for president. Dean Phillips was on earlier this year. So I've been trying to sort of do showcasing the opposite perspective throughout the year, but I know it seems like people from the right sort of carry more weight somehow for this. So an offsetting IT rebalancing the force can be.
But difficult, how do I feel about the 2024 election? It is a fucking car crash the way that the candidates have been going at each other. The way that the Press is covered it, like, the current sentiment in America is, it's white. It's like meme univer. If South Park made an election year, this is what it would feel like, Kamala Harris goes on, call her daddy. Trump gets shot once and another assassination attempt and then like it's been. So it's
It's wild. So how I feel about it is it makes for great TV but I'm glad that I'm in Texas where there's lots of room and I feel a bit safe down here and actually I'm going to be in Australia when the election happens which is probably the best place on the planet to be the original crash. 007. Do you have an inner monologue? Oh yeah. I kind of don't I've heard that some people don't some percentage of people
And you see if chat gbt what percentage of people do not have an inner.
Monologue
study suggests that 25 to 50 percent of people do not experience a constant inner monologue. This means instead of hearing a voice in their head narrating the thoughts, they might process information in more visual abstract or sensory ways prevalence, two pans varying on how the concept is to find measuring different studies. Wow, I have no idea what. It's like to not have an inner monologue because my brain is singing fucking Barbershop with each other.
Yeah, it's been the one of the biggest tasks that I've tried to do to make the voice inside of my head, my friend, to find like 25 to 50 percent of people. It's just silence in there. I didn't know. What are you doing? What are you thinking about? I don't know, but yes, I do.
And he should be kind of, I'll leave are two different questions. One asking for a friend, what is it? Good response to someone who uses the word luck to put down, one's achievements. Number two, what is your connection with music? I noticed you were Bring Me The Horizon and Parkway clothes. Have you always been into metal got any favorites? I love Santa number two, first, this is architect. This is an architect's t-shirt. Yeah, I was an emo kid throughout all of my teens and just never gave it up listening to
Of sleep token and neck deep bring me still. Now crushes, Parkway misery signals batsuits, new album is phenomenal. Polaris, just got into them outstanding. So that's what I listen to when I'm training, deep house. Usually, when I'm in the car or driving in a bit of country at other times and that's like my three car garage, metal deal house and fuck. My country music asking for a friend? What is a good response to someone who
Uses the word luck to put down one's achievements.
It seems strange to me that the harder I work. The luckier, I get
I've always loved that quote.
BH Z V1 MN. Hey, Chris congrats, it is inspiring to see someone. Hit the J curve in real time. Thank you, question. How do I deal with the fear of not having people around me? When I've finally made it, I'm in an important phase of my life. My relationship is probably going to come to an end because of my Tunnel Vision on my goals. There's this small voice in my head that acknowledges the possibility that I may never truly find a people. I would love to share My Success with. I've sacrificed many friendships to, I know I have what it takes but what if I end up alone
I'm 20. P.s. I was used to being alone until I improve myself and then found some people. But now it appears as if I'm at another revamp point my life. So I think this lonely chapter thing that I keep harping on about is just such an unseen problem that a lot of people face and it was certainly an area that I struggled with the analogy that I use for. I think what you're describing is, if you imagine
in personal growth are growing as a person, as kind of like being a rocket ship, taking off from Earth and you're moving at a particular velocity and there's other people around you and some are ahead of you and summer behind you and some took off at the same time and you're moving along. But if you start to overtake other people, you end up leaving them behind. And this isn't a value judgment about who's better, who's worse, or the people that grow more intrinsic, valuable, whatever. It's simply that the language that you use to communicate to these people in the things that you've got going on in your life in the type of
Changes that you're facing are at the altitude that you are at if you're just trying to work on your meditation practice for the first time ever and a learning about how the GTD method for productivity works, that's different to somebody who is balls-deep in emotional regulation and has been 22 years of therapy. That the challenges that they're facing a just fundamentally different because the altitudes are changed. So one of the problems that you have is if you're very quick moving velocity as
A Rocket taking off, you're going to like you said, you found people after you improve yourself. And now it looks like you're going to break through another time. That's something difficulty going to have to let go of it. It feels like survivorship bias like people that come back from war and they don't feel like they should have survived and they actually have and you're leaving behind a group of people that maybe grew up with, are you became friends with? I became friends with a really important formative point in your life and it's tough. So I think it's just
just a
It's a price of doing business cost of Entry to Growing quickly. And it sounds like you have Tunnel Vision on your goals. You know, that you want to achieve big things but I don't mean to be patronizing. Bro you're 20 and you have there are lots of people very far ahead of you that you can end up settling at their altitude with just take time, it sounds like you're thinking about things that are maybe beyond your age. So just have a little bit of faith.
That you're going to be able to bring this into land with a group of people that will care. And when you find them it'll be so worthwhile because they'll have gone through the same things too and you'll be able to resonate sure and dig 9833. I suck so hard at saying these usernames, tell us more about your childhood and how you overcame bullying and became confident.
Deep questions today. So the became confident thing I think is a probably, a misnomer competent. I can go to doing some stuff but especially this year, I've just been
Riven with uncertainty and low self-esteem and have kept going, which maybe is good for people who don't feel like they have much self-esteem or confidence to hear that. Even if you don't believe that you can do it, you can still end up doing it. But yeah, the became confident thing is, at least based on recent experience. Not not fantastically backed up in terms of childhood in Ohio overcame
I'm bullying, I don't know. Like
You just get through stuff, you know, is it was rough kit childhood, especially teenagers was wasn't super fun, being a social outcast, it was never real aggressive awful, physical bullying over and over again. There was some elements that were pretty like atrocious, but
I didn't know you're just a kid. You're made of rubber and magic. And you just sort of bounce through things or at least I kind of did even if I was unhappy and it's only in retrospect, you can see kind of how wrong things were, or how rough stuff was the overcoming. The Bullying thing.
I didn't know, I got rid of that chip on my shoulder, maybe about five years ago, you know, that was doing things to prove other people that doubted me or had mistreated me, or bullied me, or whatever wrong.
That was something that I overcame. I think largely just through achieving lots of things that I never thought I would after a while you have to sort of admit to yourself that the fuel you're using is toxic. And if you're still being driven by that kid in your nine, when you were 13 that called you that name or whatever you're giving that person an awful lot of power over you, somebody that you hate or don't like and also it's not allowing you to get to any piece like you
never going to be peaceful.
So
yeah, childhood was
I mixed bag, I played lots of sports. I spend a lot of time on my own in solitude and
It came out of it in one piece or at least in pieces that were together should I say. And then in adult life, you spend some, some people kind of arrived all put together and then some people kind of have to put themselves back together and I was the latter. And still largely, I'm doing it but I know. Hey,
Here, I am still going Lorenzo Pietra, Piana, for 707 fucking hell. What should you do? If you realize that you're striving for success is only a compensating mechanism for past trauma or an inferiority complex are. There are a lot of people just being seen by these questions. It's a bit more somber of a mood today. Both from the questions and maybe from me. I know why I am. I wonder if the questions are maybe because we're
Into Christmas or Autumn or something like that. People are starting to reflect on the year. They're feeling a little bit more Melancholy, I don't know. It's or maybe I'm getting it totally wrong and that's like a unfair assumption. What should you do? If you realize that you're striving for success is only a compensating mechanism for past trauma, or an inferiority complex. I think a lot of people it is, I think many people are trying to
Prove to the world that they are valuable in a way that in the past they felt worthless and the inferiority complex of, if only I can become sufficiently impressive. Then maybe the world will love me. Maybe if I'm create this Grand Cathedral of
Accomplishments and Accolade and status and money. Someone will Pat me on the back and tell me that I'm good enough. I think maybe that's most high-performance, maybe that's most successful people in the world, and that's sad. I think it's a an ironic realization. That many of the people that we admire the most have, the least admirable internal mental states that you literally wouldn't trade.
And the life that you think is dog shit for the one that you think is amazing. If you got to spend five minutes inside of that person's head. So what should you do? If you realize that you're striving for success is only the compensating mechanism level. You've seen through the first illusion, right? You understand why that motivation is there and you can continue playing that game and trying to fill internal voids with external accolades or
You can try and assess. Why that's the case. If it was me, I would do a good bit of internal work. I would maybe speak to a CBT person, or do some therapy or some hypnosis, I would journal and I would try and work out. Okay. Why do I think that I need to be successful in order for the world to love me? Why do I need to strive in order to create this Grand important thing? In order to feel like I am sufficient that I need to offer the world. Something in order for it to love me back, why?
I feel like that needs to be the case and is that true? Is that true? I do? Why do I love other people? Or what are the reasons like what, why do I choose to be around the people that I choose to be around? Is it because of their success, they're striving how impressive they are? Or is it that the funny and caring and hold space for me? And I kind or gentle or reassuring or enjoyable, energizing or whatever. For the most part, I've asked myself this question, too.
Two or a similar one. And for the most part, the people that I love to be around, it's got fuck all to do with, like, their accomplishments. Literally, some of my best friends, are the ones that are happy, and not striving in a, not looking for this success to, like, endlessly filling this whole, like the Cookie Monster, just eating new achievements. Look inside, and work out. Why you think that success is something that you need to do? What are you compensating for? What are your past traumas? What you're in for?
Biology complex, and then decide whether or not you want to actually, keep trying to be successful because you're not choosing to be successful. You're being compelled to be successful. It's a compulsion and I don't think that that's necessarily what you want to have in life. You don't to be forced to do anything, you want to choose to do the things that you want to do.
Justin dunkley 1848 been a pleasure to feel as if we are a part of your journey since I found you almost two years ago, thank you. My question would be from your perspective, what do you think the future of Britain is for younger Generations? Growing up? What would you suggest to peace? What would be your suggestion? What would your suggestion be to someone who wants to leave for a better life. Love you, man. You're a true inspiration to so many and seeing a fellow. Brit Shine, the weigh-ins. Shine the way in such a fashion.
Passion makes me driven for more. I cannot read today. Apparently, aah.
What do I think it? The future of Britain is for younger Generations. Growing up. What would be my suggestion for someone who wants to leave for a better life? I mean, if you want to leave, you gotta leave. Like there is no way to rework that game. I tried for a very long time to impact British culture. And you know, we had a few thousand people that work for the events company between the ages of 18 and 24 percent.
He coached maybe a hundred hundreds of young people and they went on to do amazing things. But unfortunately, as anybody in the UK knows trying to find other people that are positive positive. Some have agency are interested in trying to make change to themselves and to encourage other people to make change as well.
It's a rarity. So first off realized that if you're able to grow in that country it's a very impressive. It's like lifting a weight on Jupiter or something that it is harder than typical to break out from the mold because the tall, poppy syndrome the cutting down. And and the sort of mockery that everybody encounters are. At least everybody that I know is a big weight. It's a drag, so the future for younger Generations growing
Up. I mean the UK was, it had the second highest number of millionaires leaving in the world. In 2024, China was number one with 15,000. The UK was number two with about 10,000, but China's population. It's basically, I think, the UK's 3% of the population of China and yet it's 66 percent of the number of millionaires leaving, and China's a literal communist Communist dictatorship. So,
I would love to see a change. I tried for a decade and a half to have impact on it but I didn't know I'm I'm yet to be proven otherwise but hopefully I'm wrong. JJ LeBron 777 impressive as fuck. Thank you. Okay. Question any dream guests? You'd love to have but feel they may slightly be Out Of Reach for now any names you'd be able to drop tons. Are Ryan Reynolds would adore to speak to Ryan Reynolds? I think he's super cool.
Guy. I think it'd be really fun to talk to Larry and Sergey from
Google would be great Zuckerberg Bezos. It was his like, really really Out Of Reach. I'd like to have a chat with Beyonce. I think she'd be really interesting to speak to to work out, what it's like to be that famous or like a Taylor, Swift's Justin Bieber. I mean, Justin Bieber at the moment. With all of this P, Diddy's to speak to P Diddy him and sandbank been freed side by side in a jail cell could do a three-way conversation that be interesting. Yeah, I don't know man. There's so many just a
An endless list of people that's trying to get Bernie Sanders on for ages. That was interesting but
Yeah, I it'll be what coming up to episode one thousand, and I really want to do something like phenomenal for that period, maybe 999 1000, and thousand. And one just absolutely sort of break open all of the expectations. So I've set an expectation will see. I'm trying to do something cool for that. Matt tell 099.
Nine. You mentioned in a prior video that you have tinnitus many of us do. And it would be helpful to hear your comments on the subject and how you dealt with some of the annoyances that it brings. Yeah. I I guess this is one of the reasons why I didn't bring up the health stuff before that, so many people deal with challenges that it
It feels like another necessity for me to sort of make comments and talk about it. And the problem is that his own still going through it. I'm still trying to recover and like, it's slow, really slow and tough. And then trying to talk about your experience of dealing with the thing while you're still going through it. I'd like I just don't to be a Debbie Downer to you guys. I don't like feeling like I'm not on top of my game. I like I'm, you know, talking about all of this.
a time dealing with, but on the topic of tinnitus
It sucks for the people that don't know. It's just like a permanent loud, ringing in your ears, it specifically happens when there's lower volume. So the reason that it happens I went to go and see of course I went to go and see an ear specialist. The reason it happens is your brain when it can't detect frequencies, it tries to fill in the gaps, kind of like how the optical blind spot is filled in in post processing by your brain. This is not too dissimilar but for hearing and
It just creates this quite loud, buzzing noise and especially at times when you want it to be quiet. Like when it's silent on a night. They're trying to go to sleep. It is awful and it's for me brought on by inflammation it's brought on by my brain not being very happy. And yeah anybody that lives with this chronically, which currently I am but like you know your entire life. Not just nine months fuck. Like it's so bad. It's
so
Permanent. It's like the hearing equivalent of chronic pain. They always remind you that you're there. And the weird feedback loop is the more that you think about it, the the louder it gets, and it reacts to cortisol, which means that if you think about it and it gets louder, you get more stress because you can hear it more, which means called is all goes up, which means it gets louder. It's vicious. So yeah, I am. I'm sorry that you're dealing with that. And yeah, it's I've never heard anybody talk about it. Never had anyone.
Talk about it. And then this year, I've just been swimming in it and it sucks. So sorry, Pancho Johannes. Chris will X. What's it like being friends with Alex Hall Mosey?
It's pretty cool. It's intermittent, perhaps unsurprisingly, he's busy and so am I. So it really is Mike speed messaging memes and stuff to each other and then not speaking to each other for a month and then doing it again. Then sometimes it's more frequent. He's cool. He's a good counter balance to
Feeling like a bitch and in the right doses for me, he is a good influence, Xander Journey. What is the true definition of work-life balance for you? Not the guy to ask, bro, not this year, I have been so far on the work end of work-life balance much to the anger of the people around me that keep on telling me that I need to sleep or chill out more.
the true meaning of it, I think is
Finding a way to not
just
live life in service of work. That a lot of the time. We do things that are relaxation because we think that it's going to allow us to then go harder when we get back to work I'm not convinced that putting every single ounce of your identity into a single Pursuit. Your work is the best way to live. I think hedging your identity across multiple things. Yeah, you care about your
Company or whatever. But also your friend and you're a part-time pickleball player and you like CrossFit and you're in tube 80s Jazz and you're a father and a husband that you know, like you're all of these other things as well. And I think that like the true definition of work-life balance is having enough life that you don't think about work-life balance.
The ancient Greek word for work was not at leisure as the definition not at leisure. So work was seen as an aberration and Leisure was seen as the set point.
And it seems now in the modern world that this has been turned upside down. And Leisure is not at work, life is not at work. So yeah, work-life balance should be that you have enough life to not have to worry about work-life balance.
Auntie break even tell us your simple hack on body language. I am not convinced I have a hack on body language. I was told by lots of people that watch some of the Vlogs that I stand very still, and I reflected that and I think what's happened is because I spent 10,000 hours in my twenties, stood in the front, door of a nightclub, I got very used to standing very still with my hands.
Three positions. Okay. Like this in front, me like, that behind me. I like this on my hips are in our hands in Pockets. I guess three or four positions, and I can just stand there, not moving the hours. I get I know but trained guard, dog or something, but instead, I'm looking for people's stamps on their hands or VIP bands or something like that. I have no hack to body language. I-i'm, not even sure that it's a thing, mirroring and like holding masculine frame and all of that stuff.
Sure this better and worse ways to sit being crunched over and give you a set up, right? And you're looking around, that's and you're awake. That's usually a good
start
red, hh7 FD. If you could give one piece of advice to the young version of you, what would you give to someone the same one all the time? Which is feel, as I think a lot of
My life both now, and in the past is driven by fear, worry, anxiety, vigilance being concerned that things are going to go wrong or that you've done wrong this.
Sense. I've had for a long time that someone that mad at me and I don't know why so fearing less. I think about that would be.
A good place for me to start and one of the interesting things that you realize with this question. What advice would you give a young person of you? I think of version of you, is that if you ask yourself that question,
And you get somewhere close to an accurate answer of it.
That thing that you wish that you could tell a younger version of you is almost always the single, most important thing that you need to tell the current version of you. I'm yet to hear an answer where the person has totally sanitized themselves from the issue, that that thing would have fixed. So
Think about what you would tell yourself 10 years ago and then apply it to your life right now. Yeah, CJ wolf St. 1q, I do you think it's humanly possible for you to get through a podcast without saying Downstream, while definitely not. Now, I don't know whether I've said, Downstream yet, so far, but now you've made me fucking say it. So I can't use this as an example. Do I say it that much.
They say Downstream all the time.
I might do now, I'm worried that I say it. Fucking every other sentence. I'm going to try some point soon. CJ CJ wolf, but you've thrown me a curve ball by making me say it today. So not this time. Smoking Groove, does any part of you missed the nightlife scene? Do you know what it is? I've been reflecting on it more recently and I do miss
Like the memories I miss working with the boys building something. I missed the interplay of the team of staff that we had, you know, 10 to 20 managers, that were very, very, very tight. And then 200 to 300 staff every year, I loved it, I really did. And in retrospect it's sort of one of those things where you can only realize how beautiful it was with a bit more perspective. I certainly miss working with my business partner, Darren I'm
just a phenomenal, shrewd, Savage of a business person who you could drop him like one of those, throw me to the wolves and I'll come back the leader of the pack, it's like throw him into any industry and he'll fix so much of the operations. So I certainly must working with him and it is fun, but I do not miss the late nights and the drunk people and the loud music and fair play the club promoters to keep it going into your late 30s.
I mean, I salute, you Jake. Are you read? Pilled if not, how many steps removed from Red Pill, are you? I don't know how to answer that question. The red pill fucking hates me the manosphere absolutely. Does not take me as one of their own. I have never identified myself as those things. I seem to sit in this amazing sort of balance where
People on the left or people that are sort of more ardently feminists like fourth wave feminism, see me as a misogynist and then people on the right or people that are red pills in the manosphere see me as a cook. So I'm like, ideologically spit-roasted by either side of this. I don't know. No, I don't know. If red, pilled means understand evolutionary psychology and mating Dynamics. Yes,
If it means anything else, I don't think so.
Gank or can I get a VIP for Riverside mate? People won't get this reference. I wonder how many people in the audience will get this reference may be less than point. One of the percent Riverside was one of the big events that we ran for half a decade. We did maybe a quarter of a million entries more probably through that venue on a Saturday and I ran the VIP along with the rest of the event. So yes, you can sir,
If it's still open, I'll see you there on Saturday sagacity. Sweet science. Why don't you challenge your guests? I'm trying. I tried with my silver. I tried with Shapiro. I tried really hard with Callie means. I thought that was me giving it a really, really good crack. I tried with the therapist lady where my mold brain doesn't wanna? Let me remember her fucking. What was she called? Bad therapy. Abigail Shreya. It's a skill set that I'm building.
Adding up, I'm working hard at sitting with discomfort. I did one thing that was pretty proud of on the Wilderness and episode which was he was telling this story, he was getting emotional and you want to step in to stop, the thing from happening. You want to fix the other person. And I have a compulsion where I feel like other people's emotional states and my responsibility.
so as a people call that people pleasing, or what are you could call that just being a good person, I don't know pathology or like charity but
Sitting with the discomfort of emotion is something that I'm really learning. I learned it first from the Theo, Von episode that he did with Sean Strickland, which is just amazing, setting with Dad giving him space. And then telling him what I thought which was I was sorry. He'd gone through it. That was, I thought I was really, I was happy that I did that. Now is proud of the way when when it comes to pushing back against ideas and all the rest of it, I do I think I'm trying harder but there is
Always more to be done. Adam, who was your toughest guest? And what would you have done differently? If you think mr. Dawkins great interview by the way? I'm well. I mean, it feels like you're begging the question a little bit there. Dawkins, wasn't an easy one, firstly homeboys 80. Secondly, he's kind of disagreeable in any case, thirdly, we basically had the same conversation the night before. So thank you for enjoying it, but that was, that was a tough one out.
prematurely blowing my load in front of
1,200, Richard Dawkins fans, and then
16 hours later sitting down to be like, right? I've shown all of my cards, do I have any more cards that you have, anything else that I can talk about without going over the old stuff? That was, that was a bit of a battle Rahul. When's the next episode with mr. Hall Mosey coming out. He was just on, he's been on twice this year and was twice last year, so I think he's he's benched he's chilling out for the time. Being some point.
Probably first half of next year, he'll be back. Peyton below. Do did you have a back-up plan? I was it all or nothing for the podcast.
So happened in stages that when I first started the podcast, I was still running Voodoo. My events company, I was still modeling Saudi during its top DJ. But you know, I had a lot of different things going on. Had my properties in the UK and was just like learning about me. So I was living perfectly comfortably but then the Move To America that was all or nothing. And I never really spoke about it at the time.
How much of a?
Risk. It was I guess. I never also thought about it all that much that I just knew that I was happier out here. So I wanted to just go and it kind of didn't really care what I was risking. But I'm so risk of us for the people out there that are just terrified of taking risks. Like, I'm here with you, but I reached whatever unbelievably high threshold, I needed in order to be able to convince me that I should.
Actually commit to this decision. Yeah, if I'd come out here and the podcasts had gone wrong, or if it does go wrong. Still, it's not like I've reached escape velocity with finances, or status or business or anything like that. Like, I still need to work every single day, in order to keep this thing going. And if it doesn't work, I'm going to have to go back to the UK with my tail between my legs, looking like, a, a right knob. So
Yeah, it was when I pulled the pin exited my last company. I couldn't go back and be like, oh, hey, would you mind having me back in the company that I just left? I would, I don't know what I would have done, I don't know what I will do. If if that happens, so fingers crossed it doesn't.
SEC 82. Hey Chris, I've been watching you since the beginning and I'm so proud of your accomplishments. Thank you. Can you give an update on your experience in therapy? I'm a male therapist in training and I'm a happy positive figure in the men's space is talking about therapy. It makes my blood boil watching, some amazing friends, struggle through their life, in their 30s and 40s and feeling so low. We have a crisis on our hands. Thank you for promoting Mental Health on your channel. Keep it real, bro. Thank you. I appreciate that.
So, I did therapy twice a week for round about the last year, maybe with travel and stuff about nine months and I've actually stopped. Now, I've taken a little break for a while, partly? Because again, this is how it sucks. Like the talking about the health thing fucking just falls out of you. The only way that you can say it is to be truthful. I need more time per week to focus on the stuff that I need to do in order to be able to recover which is
Like IVs. Sauna sessions talking charcoal like tablet shower bullshit. After you go in the sun like this just it's complex. It's a lot of shit. I need to do in order to be able to get my health back. So I had to sacrifice something, something had to break and I was taking two hours to get to and from a therapy twice a week so it's four hours a week at the perfect time at the end of one of my days to Meadows. So I stopped my experience with
therapy was I learned more about myself in therapy in the space of
Nine months than in five years of meditation, that's not to say that either are better or worse. But from a,
Self-knowledge. Self-understanding standpoint, it is phenomenal, it's like inviting somebody into your house and you've lived in this house your entire life and they start walking around pointing out rooms that you didn't realize what they're like, What's that door? Where does that door lead to your holy fuck? Like, I didn't even and you open it and there's all of this stuff in. There you go shit. And then you realize that the back of the kitchen that you didn't know about leads to this,
Do that. You just found out about and that leads into this and everything starts to connect and make sense. And yeah it's a an iron stake of perspective. So the stabbed through the middle of a lot of your assumptions about yourself, it's very good but it's rough. It's not easy because you can't hide away from
the
things that you use bravado, or
Momentum, self-deception, ignorance, willful ignorance to just cover over. You can't, you can't smooth things over in that way. It just there is really nowhere to hide if you're doing it. Right? So good. But to be used with caution would be my advice. Been Rose 2329. What's been your favorite books that you've read this year? Okay? This is an easy one, fucking hell.
So whatever really enjoyed meditations for Mortals by Oliver Berkman. That is new one that just came out and I got to read that early and then he came on the show and I fucking love that man. He's so great meditations for Mortals. Highly recommended you read it once a day for four weeks, so it's like 28 small chapters and it's fantastic, so that's 170 leaves.
Gain which is just this outstanding sci-fi bug. I went through a period where when I was feeling sad on a nighttime I was comforting myself with check novels. So I read the housemaid. That's actually pretty good. Andrew Michael, ladies or Alex, Michael ladies book, The Silent patient. Also really great. Good twist at the end, started trying to read, Verity by Colleen Hoover, it's just loads of sex scenes so I bailed out of that.
But also, I read that, I really enjoyed the anxious Generation by Jonathan, haidt was good, Ted. McKenna's spiritual enlightenment now is just so fantastic. Every time that I, I think about,
The path that you're on from an Enlightenment perspective and spirituality. It's like the most objective look that I've ever had at least woo. Esoteric, look at just what enlightenment is from a person who seems pretty fucking enlightened. I've read some of the stuff on night times as well, that I can't remember.
Welcome back to you Niall Barry. 2002 who are your favorite bodybuilders past and present would love to see some of the 90s early 2000s. Legends on the Pod, love your recent blogs, man. Unbelievable work ethic. Thank you. Favorite. Bodybuilders, I mean Ronnie is an absolute Legend. Kind of makes me sad to see him. Now. You know, it's this guy that used to be just this man Mountain Behemoth and now he's got to kind of gently walk himself from bench to
Two leg press. Its, I mean the guys still just seems so fucking positive, which is amazing. Dorian Legend. He was a little bit before my time. Who else?
Like it would be interesting to see where some of the old animal athletes are like Branch Warren. I think he did. He fall off a horse and hurt himself. Branch Warren would be awesome to speak to. I know that a bunch of the guys listen to the Pod Ben pakulski in particular has reached out, we called speak to him because he's pivoted, everyone's gone in different directions spirituality or business or something else.
But yeah, that's some techie 80 36 Legend. Last time. You told me about how you fixed your back problems. This time, please be kind enough to give us the detailed start to finish of how you increase your testosterone. All right. Yes, I talked about this last year, I worked with Merrick health and now working with function and they are blood testing companies. I think the first thing is that, you need to work out what's going on inside of your body. So you need to get your
Bloods done. You can't fix any of the people talking about just like randomly increasing their testosterone levels and I have no idea what their testosterone is. So certainly for me playing around with like FSH and lsh and what's your sex hormone-binding globulin? You don't just get to sort of throw a one-size-fits-all hammer at the problem or you can do that and it'll probably reliably give you results, but there's lighter more precise ways to do it. All of that being said, I'm not convinced that
I'm the best person to talk about increasing testosterone because this year with all of the stuff that I've been going through that has been a big problem. So I think the only reason I've held onto any good condition is because of training a lot consistently but one of the problems that comes along with chronic inflammation and autoimmune is, it's not fantastic for testosterone and cortisol and testosterone and not friends. So this year has been
Again, a difficult one. I don't mean to be a fucking such a Debbie Downer today but the alternative is. I just don't tell you what's been going on and yeah, I'm not, I don't know. Do that Geneva. Arthur 8747 been listening since early 2020? My number one podcast ever since. Thank you. I'm a 51 year old mum of 3. And I've learned so much from you and your guests, which has helped me in this phase of my parenting Journey with grown kids, aged 16 to 23.
Ali, your podcast isn't meant to be a parenting podcast, but I'm a better mother due in part to so much of what you've shared.
Wow,
thank you. One question. When will you finally get a golden retriever puppy. I need a dog. I feel like all of the, all my whining, and all of my bitching about, like things are hard and I'm tired and my brain doesn't work. Would basically be fixed if I had a little nice little golden just here. So maybe that's the answer to all of these.
He's questions. That being said, I do get to hang around with a new dog called Monroe. He's beautiful. And I get to see him relatively frequently at the house. So, I've got a little bit, I'm slowly inching myself toward that, but given I can't look after myself right now. Puppy might be a bit of a big ask, but soon.
Radhika's Finch. What do you do in those times? Where even though you know you're doing the work and making the right choices for your future? You have that nagging sense of what if this is it for me and there is no more. What right? Do I have to expect anything more for myself. It's hard. Sometimes not to feel like will in Fresh Prince asking. What if I never get my life together? Semi-related note thought a tooth surface as a positive metal album. Very much feels like if modern wisdom.
It was a record.
I mean, first off the bed to thing is phenomenal, and what's the new song? Attention my God. So good. So yes, everyone should go and listen to Beartooth the surface, especially the track, a TT n on that. Um, what do you do in the times? When even though, you know, you're working hard enough, you have this nagging sense of what if this is it, for me. And there is no more. I don't know, man, I think, expanding your time Horizon here is pretty important.
It's hard because of the people that you listen to if you're listening to podcasts like this and reading introspective books and doing journaling in Southwick and all the rest of it, your comparison group is so skewed. You are comparing yourself with the smartest, most introspective, most balanced people in the world and you're watching all of these YouTubes and podcasts and, and reading these books and trying these practices. And
You're comparing yourself to perhaps, literally the number one person in whatever this domain is that you're trying to get better in and you're permanently going to be in the shadow. You have posited, an ideal, and by Design, you're going to begin comparing yourself to that ideal gas. What you're going to fall short. I think if you expand your time Horizon and you start to look over months and years rather than days and weeks, you will begin to see that. What feels like.
Like no more progress.
And that this is all that there is for you. The, you actually have been making consistent progress throughout that, and the alternative is stopping trying to get better. This, what I think it is very much is a fear this fear, that this might be it, that things might not get better. But one of the ways that you can guarantee that things will not get better is to stop working at them. There are very few problems in life that a little
a bit more attention won't help with that doesn't mean work harder always attention can result in you actually needing to take a little bit of a foot off the gas but it's paying attention, right?
And paying attention also includes expanding your your time Horizon and realizing cut. Look at where I was two years ago and look at where I am now and you have every right to wind that things aren't coming as quickly as you would like. And that the required pace of progress that you need in order to stay motivated is not where it's at. So motivation is waning. That's fine, you're that's, that's okay. But fuck me, you've got here, like, you've done an hour and 20
Listen to listening to me, harp on about introspection and, and lonely, chapter and health problems. And you are
Learning things from people, not me other people who are able to change your entire life and I really, really feel like just being less hard on yourself and and not fearing the things. I'm going to come your way. I'm, I'm pretty much adamant that
The outcomes that you are supposed to get in. Life are the ones that you're going to get and over a long enough time Horizon, people usually end up getting what they deserve and that for somebody to ask these kind of questions, I think will be exactly what you want.
Joe sheared, do any episode stand out as ones that underachieved in viewership compared to the value? It provided conversely did any do really well that you didn't think was your best work. That's interesting, it's hard with the best work thing because I can be surprised by the performance. It's like under achieved in viewership do really well. That wasn't your best work. What creates viewership and best work is not the same thing. So really, really great episodes.
Often don't do lots of plays but that's not what drives the viewership in any case. So for instance Tulsi gabbard came on earlier this show and destroyed the internet 6 million. 7 million plays was pretty surprised by that in retrospect maybe shouldn't have been but still kind of was great episode. Interesting thought that she was engaging speaker. But Oliver Berkman which is one of my top 10 episodes this year.
Awesome. So cool. Exactly why I started this show. This sort of precise self-deprecating view of The Human Condition and productivity and life and what it's all about, I knew that that was never going to do huge plays, but that did really well. It didn't underachieved him in viewership but as far as I'm concerned it vout provided all of the value that I wanted to. So yeah, the Oliver Berkman one. I wish I could gift that to everybody that listens.
It's so fantastic and Tulsi would be to or I'm like wow that came out of nowhere and then the Eric one Eric's popular but fuck me. That last episode just went to the Moon Cold home, five salt. So then you much design any updates.
I really probably should just get my act together and get this sorted, but
I've said, I mean that people have been asking for this for like two and a half million Subs. So I I probably just stopped staving things off and actually get around to it. Lalo Barber 83, have you ever considered updating a list of 100 bucks? You must read. Yeah, I should do that, too. That's a little bit.
Old. Now that being said, there's, I believe in those books and I believed in those books, when I wrote that list and even if I was to updated, I'm not, it's not like I would swap out or 100 because there are 100 books you should read before you die. Maybe 30 would change or 50 would change. Perhaps, but the some like the almanach and of all rather counts, not going anywhere. Essentialism by Greg mcewan's not going anywhere. Red Rising is not going anywhere.
I know that's not a bad shout, I'll consider it. And if I can make it better, and if I disagree with more than 30% of it, I'll consider doing it Carpe Diem. Gigi, 1hg, what would you say to a young man? Who was very lonely? That looks up to you as an idol.
I'm sorry that you're very lonely and I know how it feels and
I hope that this show provides some Solace like a little an oasis of
Comfort and some compat riots, even if their virtual and on the other side of the internet and a community of people who actually are into this stuff as well. Now, it does feel, I remember from listening to, you know, Peterson 2016, or Sam Harris or whatever it is, if you're living in butt, fuck nowhere, nobody around you. That seems to be interested in the stuff that you're interested in can be a very isolating.
Experience and it can kind of actually be even more isolating because you know, that somewhere out there, there's people that are interested in the things that you're interested in, but they're not here and the fact that, you know, that they're there almost makes it feel like more your fault more realism thing, but I'm sorry, man. I
I hope that I get to see one of the live shows or that you find your tribe. I promise that there are people out there that are interested in the stuff that you're interested in and you're worthy of finding them.
Ethan, oo, 5 6, hey Chris. Congrats love to show how to deal with the lonely chapter and loneliness. While pursuing your goals have been working toward my goals for the past few years where I lost all my friends. This year I'm quite young and struggled to find meaningful friendships and relationships, how to find meaningful friendships and relationships while pursuing your goals and coming up. Really, appreciate you again, congrats. I'm definitely seeing a trend here. This sort of lonely chapter loneliness. I'm growing. My friends are falling behind.
I'll and not coming with me and I'm, I have to make this odd trade between wanting to change myself and wanting to be accepted, and there's this tension, and then I feel this guilt about leaving them behind. I'm young and struggle to find meaningful relationships and friendships being honest, dude, when you're young, meaningful, friendships and relationships are hard to find, so don't see that as a personal curse that is endemic. It is built into the age that you are at, which is 1.
Young. It takes most people a long time to actually start to really care about the meaning that they put into their friendships. And I didn't really think about that until I was 27 28, you know, so much of it, especially with my industry was
transactional is transient, it was friendships of Fortune and convenience.
So half take it as a compliment for the fact that you're young, but have progressed quickly, half take it as not a personal curse, but an accepted problem that any mindful introspective thoughtful person has to deal with
And then take solace in the fact that there's so many other people. So I keep itching this fucking mustache, which needs to go and needs to come off.
Take solace in the fact that you're not the only person that asked this question, how many other people three other people, five of the people from another's, like, two thousand questions. Every time that we do this and then they get, they get stripped down. So many other people are dealing with this as well, so it's not just you. And the challenge that you are facing is not one that only you have to go through and everybody that wants to get to the other side of it and is where you are has to go through this, you have to go through it.
So, go through it.
Dylan Birch, congrats bro. I've listened to hundreds of hours of your podcast. Thank you w. 1 W 1 the the number one productivity tip you can think of and if possible the scientific backing such reasoning for it, thanks so much. Keep it up. Scientific productivity tip is a little bit difficult. Certainly, from a learning perspective.
Memory is repeated recall. Not repeated exposure is the best tag line. You're going to have to recall that number of times, if you want to be able to learn it but the way that the memory system works is not by seeing a thing, a lot of times. So if you were to read a page once and then try and recall, what was on the page, you will remember way more than. If you read that page 10 times, it is all about repeated recall, not repeated exposure. Secondly I guess
There's a nice breakdown of procrastination. You can sort of break it out into a series of steps. Like, do I know what I need to do next? Do I know how I need to do that thing? It kind of helps you to overcome a lot of the time at least for me, the signs of procrastination. Seems to suggest that most of the time when you're not doing anything, you don't know what you're supposed to do. So it's an ill-defined next step and if you do know what to do, you don't know how to do it. So if you get over those two things typically procrastination tends to fall.
Wait, at least for me when I'm being my gold standard self John. Oh no. I'm really curious about when and how you going to metal metalcore. Not to judge a book by it's cover by wouldn't expect someone with your background in the nightclub scene to enjoy. That particular genre. Also thanks for turning me on to sleep token. I can't get enough of take me back to Eden. Fuck, yeah, that's what I'm here for this entire podcast is me, just trying to slowly get people to listen to sleep token.
Yeah, I guess I've been wearing metal shirts on the show more because I can finally dress myself and decided that I was going to dress, like fourteen-year-old me dreamed, he could have dressed, which is to have a ton of different metal band T-shirts. I've got in and I was listening to this music when I was 13, 14 14, ish 1415, was when I first started getting into it, and then especially throughout college and all throughout uni. I mean I went through the full
Gamut from job for a cowboy to Avenged Sevenfold to every time I die to Bullet for My Valentine to Atreyu and then bring me. And, you know, and then it sort of phased up into now what this slightly more melodic, slightly more mature, sound is the, Polaris is of the world. The Sleep tokens Bill Murray.
That
I know it's, I love. I'm never going to stop listening to it, so
I'm glad and Polaris is album from last year. Highly highly highly recommended get it on. Zion s45. What were you like as a teenager? Pretty uncool think
Pretty socially, inept, not exactly a charmer and like not worldly very unworldly didn't really understand how the world worked at all. I really wish I know there's no but I think this is zero video of me from when I was a kid. I've no idea where that we do have even come from. I really wish that I could show the difference between then and now you know, like people bringing
Videos of sneaker or whatever, and he's 13. And they compare it with his red pill Arc in his fucking es la marck. Unfortunately, because I was 13 like, 20 years ago. I the that wasn't around.
Pretty uncool and spending a lot of time on my own Harlan. Sanchez, I read the Red Rising Trilogy and the King Philip Chronicle bugs because you recommended them along with Tim Ferriss. I think they were great recommendations. Fuck, yeah. Got any more at seven Eve's Dude. Love seven, Eve's read it at least three times. Now, I think that's fantastic. The Forgotten Highlander by Alistair urquhart also great. That's real life nonfiction. What am I reading at the moment? Lexicon I've got
I went through my chick novel phase earlier this year. When I was feeling sad about myself. I can't I can't remember the rest of this. I don't think I've done a massive amount of reading from that side. I would rather tax Topia, which was pretty cool but those red rising and King Philip Chronicles are just outstanding. I read the narrow road between desires, which is the new Novella that Patrick rothfuss.
Votes, I tried to get into a bunch of other stuff, but I've swung and missed a few times this year with nonfiction. Josh tuft YouTube. Do you ever worry about talking about things? You are not well-versed in and how do you overcome that fear of saying something wrong? Well, as the first question for today? Highlighted, I do sometimes say things wrong, especially if my brain isn't working correctly, do I worry about talking things? I'm not well-versed in, I think,
You can usually get away with that. If you identify that, you're not an expert. The internet doesn't have a
Particularly good. Forgiveness mechanism for people playing with ideas and this is Eric Weinstein's idea of an accuracy budget that if you restrict only experts to speak on the things that they are experts in. Nobody else is allowed to talk about or play around with ideas outside of their tight domain of competence or whatever. What you end up with is a situation where no one can ever play with ideas in the way.
That precisely sort of cross domain learning is supposed to work. So I know I'm trying to
I'm purposely trying to get out over my skis and and come up with new ideas. I came up with this thing to do. It has MPEG a little while ago and I really enjoyed this evolutionary psychology perspective on why thin people seem to be very
Critical of widespread exempt accuse, and my theory was that people who were able to easily, get thin reduce down the status associated with being thin previously. It was something that was difficult to achieve in required willpower. Now it just requires a, an injection, once a week, over simplification. Obviously see. Now I'm having a caveat everything case up fucking. Put my foot in a gun.
That I thought was an interesting take, is it right? Probably not but I like playing with it and I tried to caveat with in that post which was I actually used the word, bro, science theory. So talking about stuff that you not well versed in just stayed up top look, I got no idea what I'm talking about but here's a notion that you should consider. I think you can usually get away with that. How do I overcome the fear of saying something wrong? Be around people who are forgiving of your ideas like you want to be around people who like yeah, that's interesting. I think it's total bullshit. That's not a bad take
That's the perfect environment to be in.
Quote Brainiac to 593 how to deal with the guilt of ghosting, all your friends and acquaintances. I'm an introvert. But the last 10 years tried to be more extroverted accepting invitations to Gatherings and giving much of my time and energy to help friends since the last six months have been extremely recluse from everyone as I recover from burnout, working my business, feel like a fake manipulated them through a performance of kindness. Not through though, not malice.
Yeah, that's a difficult one and think you necessarily need to ghost them. My advice here would be to just say, hey, I'm really working hard on my business fucking dealing with burnout. I'd love to catch up at some point in future.
The fact that you're an introvert, who fought a full decade managed to be more extroverted and overcome. It suggests to me that you have a lot of capacity, and at the moment, maybe you just need a bit of time to recover. So I would just tell them like be truthful. Hey, I'm working on some stuff on my own would love to catch up but I just need a little bit of space. I've had to do that this year, like it's been really bad an hour and a half deep.
This, I can talk as much as I want.
I've had to do something not not too dissimilar to this year although it wasn't because I made myself more extroverted. One of the really sort of unenjoyable challenges of some of the health stuff I've gone through is it impacts your mood and your extraversion and your bravery as well. Sort of your courage to go out and do things and your desire to be around people. So I've ignored texts or not replied to text for ages because I was embarrassed.
To say that I don't want to come out, I can't come out or you just feel too rough or or I don't know. Just I didn't want to see people. I didn't want to hang about and I wanted still keep the show going and I want to you know keep this momentum and keep learning and doing all the rest of the stuff and something had to give. And a lot to be honest this year, a lot of that was social engagements and spending time with friends. So a lot of friendships have had to drop and a lot of the time with that, I just had to say, hey man, like I'd love to hang but I'm just I'm sort of going through it at the moment.
Moment. So
Like a loop back to you when things are better. And most people my everybody actually was like, fuck, dude, like I'm so sorry to hear that if there's anything I can do to help, let me know. So for the friends that I didn't get around to replying to, I'm sorry and for the friends that said I hope that everything gets better. I appreciate you and I think that your friends would say something not too dissimilar as well. Nobody wants to force their friend out, he's got fucking burn out and is recovering from his building a business. Like just what you want to entertain them like the wine, roll you out, like some.
Dancing monkey. Those aren't friends who one kiss one. How did you deal with the loneliness and school? Yeah, really digging into my fucking past traumas here on me.
How did I deal with loneliness in school? To be honest. I just don't think I knew that. I was lonely. I mean I was, I was alone all the time. All I did was be alone. I was alone in my room playing. I was alone in the schoolyard. I was alone in lessons. I was alone. Walking home. So,
I played Sports, which was good because Sports force you into a team and I was good at sports, which was also great because people kind of want you around even if you're socially kind of useless, if you're useful in a sporting environment your functional people keep you around. So that was good. I guess I made myself.
I made myself useful and I wonder whether that's a lesson that kind of followed me a little bit into adulthood which is in order for the world to love you. You need to be useful or competence or impressive or whatever and that goes back to one of the questions from before, which is how many people striving and success is very tied to this need for validation this sort of compensating mechanism. I dealt with it by not knowing that it was a problem and
Yeah, I think in many ways it makes you very robust as an adult because you're so used to being on your own you don't owe moving to a new country and not knowing a single person. Fine, I getting to know more people more quickly than I did for the half decades that I was in school.
Yeah, it's weird. Kids are resilient men. Like it seems like the more that I learned about parenting Styles and stuff. Unless you do something really, really atrocious to your kid for the most part. They end up coming out like pretty fine. At least I did after a lot of work that's not to say see I'm now I'm Kathy adding again in case I fucking get in trouble from the internet and it gets clipped not saying that you can neglect your child. And that's an optimal way to raise them. What I am saying.
In is the parents who are concerned about not being perfect, or about their children. Going through difficult things, I think that they are more resilient than we all give them credit for. And if we look back at our own childhoods, what we realize is that we dealt with stuff that we were very, very we wouldn't want our kids to go through and yet we came out
Not totally shattered into pieces. Maybe just a little bit fractured.
Realistic management. How do you stay grounded with all the demands of your newfound success at the grounded thing? To be honest is pretty easy. I'm not around many people. I don't have a particularly big ego much to the perhaps surprise of people that don't know me. Well, but no, I, I've never struggled with ego, I think being
So self-critical, it's like, it's weird.
Low self-esteem, a low confidence is a good proxy for humbleness like it does. Keep you humble, how can you ever get too big for your boots when you don't ever believe that you're worthy of the things that you've done so it's like it's certainly not optimal but functionally it ends up doing not too different of a service. One of the more difficult things has been working out whether people want to be sort of in your life around you because
Cuz they like you as a person or because they think I know that there's some status to be associated with hang around with you which even that like what am I fucking rapper makes a month like Montage to called Entourage of people seem old brain, this Entourage of people around me.
I don't think that I have this.
I don't know, orbiters blast, radius Paradise thing that would inflate my ego to that point. So and also, I still work with most of the people that I did each new member of staff and I think anybody's joined and laughed.
Moment an assistant who joined four years ago is still with us. Dean that was with me six and a half years ago still with me and each different person that comes along that I hang around with. They keep my feet on the ground. They definitely don't sort of believe any fucking hype, only the paranoid survive for four form. Congrats Chris, any new dating advice. Have you been having any luck, finding a woman with similar interests and depths to their Consciousness? Maybe I'm simply looking in all the wrong places.
Keeping having any luck finding a woman with similar interests are depths to their Consciousness. This is going to be a fucking hard question for me to answer, isn't it?
Personally not being a massive priority, just trying to hold my life together. This year has been a full-time job. So any new dating advice finding a woman with similar interests and depths to their Consciousness? If you are the sort of person that cares about the way that somebody else thinks I think,
Allowing allowing yourself to not at least as a guy.
Allowing yourself to not be distracted by Pretty Girls is a really really good idea because there are so many times where there will be a heart pretty girl that you think wow. Like you know maybe this is exactly perfect and then you realize that you don't have anything in common. I'm sure that it has to be the same for girls as well. Some bloke that they go on a date with like you're really handsome and we have nothing in common.
And I am kind of losing brain cells by talking to you. You just need to cut and run from those. I think I know that it's seductive and I know that they look pretty and I know they smell nice and I know that they like flick the hair in a key way or whatever, but they're not for you, they're for someone but it's not for you. So like have the courage of your standards in that area. Now if you start to
Get yourself into the realm of. Well, they need to be PhD level or above. And they need to be this BMI and they need to have this boob size and they need to be this age and all the rest of it. You're starting to set very high bars but what it sounds like is that you're struggling to find similar interests steps to Consciousness. Okay? Optimized for that. Don't optimize for the other stuff. You start optimizing for the other stuff. You will sacrifice these and maybe you'll come across a unicorn and they've got absolutely everything but don't get distracted by pretty girls and pretty
Eyes. When you're looking for people with similar interests and deep Consciousness has, that's my advice Eduardo Munos official. What is the best way to manage the painful cost of being exceptional? I mean, how can you follow through with your purpose and goals? Taking the necessary actions to achieve them and not doing what everyone else does. When the only proof you have that you're doing the right thing is entrepreneurship and self-improvement content on YouTube. This is the other side of the long chapter. So
Part of it is the social side and the other part of it is the uncertainty that the actions you are taking are going to lead to positive outcomes at the end of your life. I mean, I don't have a title for my book and the amount of people that bring up this lonely, chapter thing is wild. The lonely chapter for a buck kind of sounds a bit miserable but it's definitely resonating with people, so I'd know. I maybe maybe I should do a more Deep dive on it.
But yes, you're doing all of this stuff, you're learning all of these fucking productivity techniques and you're watching these YouTube videos, and you're listening to these podcasting, you're taking these online courses, and you've got skillshare, and you've got read wise, and you're doing spaced repetition and morning routine, and you have no idea if it's going to work.
But the thing is no one has any idea if it's going to work. That is a painful cost of trying to do things with no promise that they're going to succeed.
If you knew that it was going to work, there would be no risk in doing it because it would be certain. So everybody has to deal with this. This is the thing, this is why I use this term personal curse. It was what I wrote for myself.
You're not, you haven't been given this. Bespoke idiosyncratic challenge that only you have to face. This is what every person who gets from a place that they are to a place that they want to be, has to go through, because you need to try things with no, promise that they are going to work. There's no confirmation of Glory or success or Accolade or Prestige anything on the other side, none of it at all. You're just it's an it's not even like you're David Goggins with broken.
Legs running a fucking Navy, SEAL, hell week. It's mundane daily just uncertainty and like ambient malaise as you're reading another book on meditation, and you're sitting down with your eyes closed. Listening to Sam Harris. Tell you to fucking listen to your breath. You don't know that it's going to work, but that is the challenge. The challenge has no certainty.
That's the way it is. And the painful cost of being exceptional is getting through that uncertainty.
Monk I-94 one. How scared should I be of mold? Yeah. Okay so this was I guess another element of the Litany of health problems. I've had this year, much of it, at least in part was brought on by the past house. That was in the previous studio. Is why we're in a new studio which isn't killing me. Hooray,
Fuck.
I don't want to like, put the shit out of everybody, because so many houses, especially what's called sub tropical temperatures will have mold, the loads of people. It's not a problem. So how scared should you be of mold for loads of people? Not at all, but for some people for people who have a disposition for autoimmune problems or for other people who work themselves quite hard, and
Maybe running their immune system, a little
bit ragged.
I'd get your house tested and if you are tired no matter how long you sleep and if you are dealing with brain fog, and if you feel like your mood is never up, no matter what you do that happiness is something that is a heavy lift naturally, when it shouldn't be and it wasn't previously, I would get your house tested for mold and I would get an immune Market test done. There's a number
So that you can get done quite easily and I would check what's going on in your blood. So for many people, totally, not a totally not an issue. If you've got mold in your house, but for some people, it's just get out. Don't try and remediate it. Just leave your house.
Kwin 92 92, when you have an academic, like, Eric Weinstein on the Pod, and he's branching out in all different, directions, hitting topics, and Concepts. You might not understand or heard of do you then? Go back over the interview and take a deeper dive into these things to educate yourself further. If so, how do you do it? You make a note and then take a deeper dive into reading or watching The Docks. Love the show. Let's go. 3 million. Thank you. I have done some of that, especially on the episodes that I really want to go back over. I usually,
Eric's a good example because I have no fucking idea where he's gonna go. So I can't really sort of detect it Oliver. Berkman, for instance, I'll go back and listen to that. But I've done so much prep and I understand his work so well. I think that I I know where it's going to go. I don't really need to remind myself after I can just sort of luxurious 8 as it goes along. Weinstein is much more like riding a very unsafe roller coaster car and holding on for dear life and hoping that you don't get thrown out.
Out. So I don't take a ton of notes after the episode, remembering that doing three-week means, I already need to be thinking about the next one, but I do revisit them and I do enjoy listening to guests on the show because I made the show for me. Like, they're all people I want to speak to by Design. So yeah. Ryan's Spalding. What's the underlying theme behind every interview you've done? Like, does it seem like there's
a particular mindset or advice, that's common in most, if not all of the interviews
you've done
This is two questions. I guess the underlying theme is just how to understand yourself. That's the thing I wanted to learn. When I first started the show, I didn't understand myself, I didn't understand how the world worked and I hoped that if I spoke to enough people who did that, maybe it would help and I think it has the particular mindset or advice. That's common in most, if not all of the interviews I've done it does vary but
There is this sort of sense of letting go of sort of relinquishing of control. A reduction of fear that I think is, is very common across a lot of the episodes. People people learning to not fear so much about the outcomes that they're going to get in their lives, but working harder. So it's this odd blend right between the two. It is beautiful, you can do it, you can
Work harder and also the outcomes that you're going to get to go and come along. No matter how much you fear of oscillate about them. So even in that there is a paradox which I think is why continuing to go over the same. Kinds of topics is interesting because it each time it gives you a new perspective and gives you a way to manage the distinction in the tension between these two things, snow bear you to. I will we ever see a modern wisdom
A production episode, Bernie Sanders is absurd and Joe Rogan is still one of the best JRE episodes to date. I love Bernie on Rogan, I thought that episode was fantastic, I guess it. We've tried to bring him on. I would love to speak to him. I think he's super interesting. I I mean think about all of the different things that that goes seen. He has been
Like competitor.
Outkast independent threat, then like back in the tent, but I would, why would really love to know. I don't know how much you can talk about this. Think about the social politics internally inside of the democratic party. If you're a guy who basically tried to, he was the Trump of the left-right, he tried to sort of flip the am aware, not specifically but like look caviar Ting. Don't get me in trouble I promise he tried
To sort of flip the table over, he was as close to that. I think, as you're going to get on the left of a disrupter in many ways, I would love to find out. Does he think that he was sabotaged? It seemed like he had all of this momentum going in and then, and then it doesn't happen and God, I mean, yeah, he's great. I think he's, he's like a fascinating individual. I would love to and really trying to educate myself about the best meaning parts of the left. I think the ways that the left gets it wrong as
Memed, especially on my side of the internet that it's very obvious, and it can sort of, cause me, certainly to be like, hypersensitive to them. Like, oh, there's that thing again. Right. Right. Okay. What is the left?
In its absolute best light not from Libs of tick-tock, not a takedown from the daily wire. What is the absolute sort of best foot that they can put forward and
Given the people.
Struggling with cost of living.
What does Bernie Sanders think about immigration?
I'm no idea. I'm no idea what he thinks about immigration into the biggest talking point for the right. I'd love to know so Bernie if you're listening to hours deep into a 2.75 million Q&A episode, call me
Our Jones es7 you are, is sobriety still easy for you, or is it a daily /, regular Challenge and have temptations as a fellow? Brit, it's the hardest thing to kick because it's pretty much in our blood as much as betting shops harder than cigs. I reckon. Yeah, dude, I am. Okay. Wish that I could sympathize with you but honestly, I don't ever think about it, but ever think about it.
I did like I say that six months, three times and then 1000 days once and it just broke, I've been to six-month periods broke it and then the thousand days just annihilated it does. No part of me that never feels the compulsion to have a beer but I remember what it was like. I remember what it was like as a British young dude, 2221, I was working at the AAA doing outbound telesales so
NT think I was 20 or 21 outbound telesales and there was a summer where I would get this Friday afternoon. Itch it would be 1 p.m. 2 p.m. and there would just be this desire to have a Corona and then to go and get on it with the boys. That's how it felt. It was it was like an itch gravitational, pull toward a beer and
It's nothing like a dependency because I was only doing it every other week or something. I really wanted was some times where it really cold to me. So,
I promise you. If you work at it, you may need to change your friend group. You may need to go monk mode for a little while, I promise. If you stick it, it you'll just something snaps inside of that.
Link that you have between having a beer and having fun and sometimes having a beer can be fun, but the only way to have fun is to have a beard that gets severed. So
Yeah, I hope that that helps. Wow. That was a two hours. Look, I am I appreciate you guys listening to me?
Start to open up about this stuff and I really think that will have the opportunity to hopefully teach people who are dealing with some of the health problems that I've gone through or a worried about, I need to learn about them. I really hope that that's something that I'm going to be able to do more of on the show, appreciate you being patient because it is like I'm learning out loud in real time here. Trying to get things right? Get them.
Carers going to not be as transparent as I would like to be and then have to fucking retcon and say hey I've been able to however long or whatever I've been dealing with. So thank you for your patience, thank you for your support. It's 3 million. Next my my Lord are at waffled enough preaching.