If you're going to be brave, you're going to know uncertainty and risk and emotional exposure. And if you think you're being courageous, and you're comfortable, you're probably not being that brave.

I see an increasing number of people opting out of love because of their fear of grief, opting out of courage because of their fear of failure, opting out of belonging because of their fear of disconnection.

Now, when I start to feel resentful, the first thing I say is what do I need that I'm not asking for? What do I need: rest, play, sleep, time away? What do I need that I'm not asking for?

Just the ability to name shame starts to weaken it, because shame cannot stand being spoken. Shame works when it convinces you that you are alone. And then, when you name it and wrap words around it, and then speak it... shame can't hold on to anything, because now I don't think I'm alone anymore. And that's the prerequisite for shame to work; I have to believe that I'm alone.

The near enemy of love is attachment. Attachment masquerades as love. It says, I will love this person because I need something from them, or I will love you if you love me back; I love you but only if you'll change and be the way I want. This isn't the fullness of love. Instead, there's attachment; there's clinging and fear. True love allows, honors, and appreciates. Attachment grasps, demands, needs, and aims to possess.

The stories that we make up, because we're making them up to self-protect, the stories we make up grab our greatest shame triggers, our biggest fears about ourselves, and just explode them in order to assure maximum protection.

You've got to constantly check the narratives. We believe what we tell ourselves about ourselves ... If someone couldn't love you, didn't have the capacity or didn't want to love you, it doesn't make you unlovable. Because people didn't see value in what you produce or create doesn't make you less valuable. We have to really challenge the narratives that we have bought into, and we've our lives around them.

You can't expect people to innovate and create if you don't allow people to fail because, by definition, innovation is iteration, failure, and iteration, like that's the definition.

When you normalize discomfort and hard conversations in an environment, miracles can happen.

I think, so often in our lives, and mine included—I just had a morning like this today, it was really hard and stressful, and I had to work through some really uncomfortable stuff—we're always looking on the outside of us to figure out how can I find my way back? How can I get re-tethered? How can I get grounded? ... The anchoring happens within. There is nothing external that's going to offer us a way home.

The biggest barrier to courageous leadership and courage in general is not fear; it's armor. What do we do when we feel exposed? How do we self-protect? And how do those pieces of armor keep us from growing into who we're supposed to be.

Somehow we believe that we are entitled to be comfortable. And I've never done anything really meaningful in my life that was comfortable.

I think one of the biggest barriers to raising vulnerable courageous kids... is parents who put too much emphasis on cool. Cool is a straitjacket.

Over the years, we learn to armor up. And there are many different forms of armor—perfectionism is one, cynicism is one, control is one, power over. There are a lot of different ways we armor up against uncertainty.

I do not allow myself to say overwhelmed without stopping what I'm doing and going outside and walking. If you're going to say you're overwhelmed, then you're going to own it, and you're going to address it.

You can be brave and afraid at the exact same time, at the exact same moment—and most of us are.

Envy and jealousy are very different constructs. Envy is wanting something that someone else has. Jealousy is the fear of losing something we have to someone else.

Compassion is not a relationship between the wounded and the healed; it's a relationship of equals ... Compassion is knowing your darkness well enough that you can sit in the dark with others.

I have to do something quiet, alone, and rhythmic on a daily basis or I would probably die.

The research shows that the practice of simple mindfulness and compassion meditation practices can be enormously helpful in not so much changing our anger initially or suppressing it or controlling it but becoming aware of it.